Seducer666

predator.

.

His words spilled out upon the page

Like sensual kisses so perfectly placed 

She drank them in like drops of sin

Seductively luring her embrace

The dance went on into the night

As she hung on his every sweet word

Failing to notice the vampire glare

Till his teeth sunk deep into her flesh

.

.

image from Pinterest

 

Gentle Kindness Coaching Facebook – Overcoming Emotional Wounds

GentleKindness

Visit my Facebook page for Healing and Overcoming Emotional Wounds – gentlekindnesscoaching

for…

Survivor’s of narcissistic abuse

Survivor’s of Psychopathic Abuse

People with C-PTSD from Trauma and emotional abuse

Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents

Daughter of Narcissistic Mothers

Sons of Narcissistic Parents

Survivor’s of Sexual Abuse

Survivor’s of Partner Abuse

Adult Children of physical and mental abuse

People Pleaser Syndrome

Codependence

PSTD

Depression and Severe Anxiety Disorder Looking for Healing

Anyone Looking for NLP and Hypnosis for Healing

View original post

Do We Live in Simultaneous Realities?

GentleKindness

Everyone searches for a purpose to their lives. Some people are more focused on just surviving, but in the end humans are wired for more than simply existing.

Different people see their purpose differently. Time and age can change where you focus your energy.

Some people focus more on others than themselves and feel more fullfilled if they are serving others. Some people look to invent something that will improve the lives of others.

We need all different kinds people, with different skills and interests in order to tap into multiple kinds of brains and different kinds of intelligence.

I believe that each of us is happier when we feel like we are able to use and develop our best gifts, and what we feel drawn to do.

It is easy to get off track because others think they know what we should be doing. And some people only want…

View original post 288 more words

Mindfulness about Pain and Sickness

.

.

Itching

Fatigue

Skin rashes

Arthritis

Back pain

Joint pain

Insomnia

Hang nails

Infections

Pink eye

Vomiting

Hair loss

.

mountain heart.jpg

image from Pinterest

.

 

No wonder we become distracted, redirected and forgetful about being in touch with our higher consciousness level selves.

We can’t even call them on the cell phone, never mind ask them to relate to what we go through.

Getting into a higher level state requires detaching from our  physical selves. It is like ignoring the squeakiest wheel. ….and as we know, the squeaky wheel gets the attention.

We can have wonderful intentions of growing towards a higher consciousness level and then we develop some new pain or disorder…whether mental or physical.

We are subjected to all manner of mind control and persuasion techniques by society and the manipulators within it. And our bodies take more and more of a beating as we age.

Beating yourself up over not being able to do certain things is unproductive. It might be that you don’t do certain things well, because those are not the things you were meant to be doing. If you were meant to be doing something, you would feel passionate about it. 

It is effectually beating up yourself with the ideas that someone else put into you. The thoughts you have about not being good enough are programs that were hacked into your brain by others. 

.

 

As far as your body goes…it is always trying to help you. Your body wants to protect you, as well as itself. It is the house for the soul and the mind. Your body works hard all the time to repair itself, but it needs your help to do the right things to care for it.

.

The idea that some people might give you that your body is working against you, is not true. And this very thought will cause a battle between the mind and the body. This will cause disease and sickness.

 Repressing your feelings about things will cause a physical response, because those feelings want to be paid attention to. You may have been conditioned that you have to shut down your feelings.

You may have been taught that it is weak to express your feelings. At the same time, you know that repressing feelings will cause your body to weaken. 

So we have to accept the inner child in order to heal…accept suffering as part of existing in the physical realm….sit with our pain to comfort it to ease it….

walk through painful experiences to get to the light on the other side…

.

…believe in your own resilience to be able to experience your feelings and care for them…

.

…and detach from the ego and identifying with our identity in order to achieve a higher consciousness…..

Yet in detaching from our ego we are acknowledging our identity with it…..so we first have to recognize the ego as a construct that is heavily influenced by brainwashing, false beliefs programmed into us, and manipulative people with their own agendas to serve..

We then can understand that many of our automatic  thoughts and attachments come out of this programming. …making the majority of the tapes running in our subconscious mind basically bad viruses…..and our conscious negative thoughts results of the viruses…..

Then we can begin to understand that We Are Not Our Thoughts….

Once we begin to accept that we are not our thoughts, we can open the subconcious mind to new formatting….better programming….we can alter and add new beliefs…and delete contaminated beliefs…..

A new understanding begins to arise at the back of our brains where those core beliefs are housed….that if our thoughts are not us, then we can observe our thoughts and evaluate their validity….

.

Holding onto beliefs that no longer serve us is not necessary. In fact it is important to rid yourself of false beliefs that you are holding in your subconscious.

.

You need to evaluate what beliefs are driving your emotions. Then see which ones are actually your own, and which ones were programmed into you.

 It is the attachment to those addictive beliefs and thought patterns that keeps us controlled by others….and keeps us in learned helplessness….

We are not the sum of our thoughts.

.

If you think of your thoughts as furniture occupying your brain, you can see how you have the power to arrange it however you wish.  

.

Rearrange that furniture.  Throw out old pieces that are no longer needed. Add some select new pieces that support you better. You can even re-frame some memories that are keeping you trapped in the picture that you imagine you are trapped in.

.

The house remains, even when the things inside are altered. Your higher self can guide you to know what thoughts fit you, and what ones are destructive. 

So who is doing the altering and rearranging? It is not our physical selves….It is not our thoughts that are observing themselves….

Once we begin to realize this, then we catch a glimpse of what is doing the observing….It is not within the brain or the physical body….

It is that higher self…the higher consciousness….that can be awakened to observe and repair the subconscious …where suffering is at its roots….

.

Thoughts about suffering seem to create more suffering…and fear that the suffering will get worse….or continue to last is the root of the most painful mental and physical suffering.

.

Yet somehow you are beginning to suspect the most curious thing of all….that by entering this kind of trance….that very trance you have allowed your mind to enter while reading this….you were able to detach from your physical suffering for a few minutes…..

And so we took the journey together….just you and I….in a higher realm of consciousness….

Namaste..

Annie – gentlekindness coaching

.

.

Mimics

colors painted woman                                                             image from pinterest

.

Self expression

Creativity 

Imagination

Sculpting a creative work

That is truly your own

Whether it be art or music

Poetry or fiction

A new yoga posture to share

Decorating a lampshade

Or painting an old chair

Imagination, creativity and discovery

Can counter the darkness….

.

black nails                                           image from pinterest

.

Of the Soul-less ones

Who can merely mimic others

Mimics

Emulate emotions they do not feel

And injure others for their own gain

They are shadows walking the earth

Hollow except for darkness…

having contempt for those

with authentic minds

and empathic hearts…

Those practitioners of darkness

 

that walk the earth in pretense…

Merely to mimic and exploit

To sadistically seduce

In order to drink the pure energies

Of the empaths and the artists

The vulnerable and the passionate

.

black ghost.jpg

 

The hollow ones 

Wandering from one victim to the next…

Leaving destruction in their wake

like an insane rogue villain

The fog if darkness left on your door step

Then on to ring the next door bell

Wash, rinse, repeat

.

 

image from pinterest here 

 

Playing with the Drawing Program on Image Chef

What is the Meaning of Blogging?

.

quill2

.Image source Pinterest

.

I had to take a break from blogging for a few weeks, due to needing to deal with a financial emergency. I have managed to begin to recover the situation now, and I am glad to be back here to say hello to all of you. 

.

 

I missed the connection with all of my lovely followers, and the gentle clicking of the laptop keys as I watch the words flow out as if they have a mind of their own.

.

Words can have magic and power. They have the power to inspire and uplift. And they have the power to destroy and crush.

.

writing

.

image from PINTEREST

.

Some people wield words to brag and give the impression of importance in the grand story of their lives.

.

Others use words to manipulate and to lure unsuspecting victims to their demise.

.

 Still others, simply seek to reach out for that elusive human connection, and to convey compassion and deep meaning to the readers. 

.

And some writers seek to entertain, to delight and bring laughter and inspiration to their readers.

.

laughterlaughter 2.jpg

.image source PINTEREST                                           image source PINTEREST

.

While others see writing as therapy and a way to discover and express the thoughts both hidden and exposed. 

.

No matter what, words are a tool that are used by each person in their own unique way. We are all connected in the universe and part of a greater humanity.

.

The feelings and experiences of one person, can be felt and related to …by someone on the other side of the world.

.

Blogging is a way for us to hang onto our humanity, in a world that continues to get more technical and where people spend more time staring at screens than they do into the eyes and faces of other people.

.

 What are  the things that matter the most to all of us? What are the questions and the puzzles that we seek to solve?  

.

What are the emotions and thoughts that arise from the farthest reaches of our subconscious, when we lay in bed at night? 

.

Let’s see what you have to say.

.

Write your thoughts and feelings down. See them flow out from your fingertips and onto the laptop screen. 

.

writing 3.jpg

.image source PINTEREST

.

Whether you be new to blogging, or a seasoned practitioner… your voice is needed by someone who is waiting to read just the very words you are about to write.

.

There is a heart and a mind that is needing to hear just the very thing that you are about to type. So get blogging and keep those thoughts flowing !

Be What You Imagine You Could Be

.

 

imagine

.

As you are walking along your path, you can be who you are at any time, even as you discover new things about your true self. You are not consigned to have to be imprisoned by your past, or the story of your life. It does not have to define you. 

Just think of the story as events that happen to have occurred, and things you have been in the midst of at various times. The choices you made in different circumstances were based on your programming and the beliefs you were holding in your subconscious at the time. 

Many of the beliefs you hold in your subconscious brain, are things that were programmed in by other people you have interacted with, by your family of origin, and by society. Any toxic shame you are carrying was brainwashed into you. Self doubt and ;earned helplessness are other things that come from believing that “you are your story.”

You are not your conditioned thoughts. You are not your story. You are not your past. 

You are infinitely more that anything that has happened to you, and anything you have ever done. You are expansive and go beyond this illusion that you have been told is the only reality that matters. 

There is more to reality than you see. There is more to you than other people tell you. Your feelings and intuition can guide you. You must re-train yourself to feel your feelings without self judgement. Your feelings are not your enemy, and they never mean that there is something wrong with you. 

The more you shove down your true feelings and your true thoughts, the more the illusion draws you in. Who says that your inner thoughts about how your reality should be are wrong, or that they have to be approved by society?

What visions and dreams would you have, if you did not fear your own judgement of yourself? What possibilities are there that you tend to shut down, because you fear the judgement of others? What things have you denied in yourself,  because someone else told you there was something wrong with it? 

You are in this life to explore the dreams and possibilities. You can expand beyond the role you are playing.

This pattern of feeling obligated to repeat the same kinds of behaviors day after day is like a self imposed prison. You can be who you are, even if that does not match what people expect from you.

As a child you had imagination and played out roles and situations in a way that allowed you to explore your ideas and your feelings. Society and the people in your life may have crushed your imagination down, and discounted it as childishness. 

Imagination is one of your greatest gifts. It allows you to explore possibilities and come up with creative solutions for problems. Imagination can take you outside of the box you have been restricted to and to mentally explore your own expansion.

Dream and allow your visions to be free. Imagine and create as you desire. Be who you dream of being. Follow your passions and part the veil that has been limiting your potential to be your true amazing self.

Wounded Healers

Emotions should be treated with kindness and a gentle spirit. When an emotions feels like it is too overwhelming you can console that feeling and care for it. 

Think of your emotions and feelings as children who need to be taken care of and nurtured. If you abandon your feelings they will only grow more. You have to walk with them and hold their hand. 

Emotional wounds

When you feel sadness, grief or anger there is always a reason for it. Sometimes the reason is obvious and other times the emotion is coming from an old emotional wound. 

Emotions are always trying to tell you something. They are trying to protect you from something. 

It can feel like we cannot handle feeling the emotions and so we try to bury and repress them. But this is a way of abandoning ourselves. 

Abandonment

You have already been abandoned by other people in your life. You have been rejected by people and hurt by people. Your emotions are telling you that you need to be cared for.

Self Love

Self love is a powerful thing. It is not selfish , even though you may have been taught that way. Often the people that discourage us from caring about our own feelings, do so for their own agenda. 

In another words, they try to get you to forget about your needs and feelings, because they are protecting their own needs and feelings. This is kind of hypocritical …isn’t it?

Emotional fractures.

Refusal to listen to your emotions will cause you to break down and become fractured. Emotional wounds are often fractures parts of you that were hurt and abandoned at an early age. 

These fractured child parts are trying to get your attention. They want to know that you have not abandoned them. Your inner child needs to know that it has not been abandoned by you too.

Nurture your pain.  

When emotional pain comes up please nurture it as you would a sick child. Care for your feelings and console those wounded parts of yourself. Ask them what they need and have not been getting.

You can find ways to heal the emotions if you listen to them first. It is not selfish to care about your own feelings and the needs of your emotional body. Your emotional health is connected to all of you.

Separation from the emotional body

In order to give of yourself, you have to have something left to give. When we neglect emotional wounds, part of ourselves becomes separated from the whole. 

You need to be whole and your emotions need to be integrated with all of you. Your spiritual health and emotional health are connected. Your physical health is also connected to your emotions. 

Inner Child 

Listen to your inner child and all of your emotions and feelings. Nothing comes up for no reason. There is always a reason if you are feeling something. 

You have much to offer the world. You are a unique person with very special gifts to offer and to explore. 

Acceptance of self

 

Everything about you will flow better when you nurture your feelings. Do not abandon yourselves by stuffing down your emotions. Allow your feelings to be accepted without judgement. 

You can survive the feelings as you experience them as a caretaker. You may fear that you will be overwhelmed by your emotions but you cannot push them away from you. 

Old emotional wounds

 

When you nurture and care for your feelings, the pain will release from you. You may find that the root causes are from long ago and the wounds have been re-opened by some person or situation. 

If this happens then the old emotional wounds were never healed from the past. They are coming up in order to ask you to care for them. 

 

 

Carrying shame with us is possible the single most devastating, caustic thing that can happen. We must find our way out of shame, because it will destroy is by crushing our self esteem and keeping us incapacitated, by self doubt and a feeling if unworthiness.

Shame is an emotion and it is a state of mental trauma. Any type of severe trauma can cause us to carry shame. In turn “shame” itself can cause mental trauma. Most often, a mental state of “shame” was brought on by others who intentionally manipulated and traumatized us into feeling unworthy and shameful.

Shame, according to Wikipedia

Shame is a negative, painful, social emotion that can be seen as resulting “…from comparison of the self’s action with the self’s standards…”.[1] but which may equally stem from comparison of the self’s state of being with the ideal social context’s standard.  Wikipedia

So, shame is made up of…

1. a person’s personal feeling about who they “should be”

and

2. the person’s feeling about “who they are”

3. When the perception of “who you are” does not meet your standards of “who you should be” then the result is feeling shameful, for not having the ability to be the person that you “should be.”

Who should you be? Where do our concepts of our “perfect selves” come from? Are the reasonable? Do these ideals of who we “should be” come from our own minds? Or were they projected onto us by others?

Also, where does our perception of “who we are” come from? Are we really seeing our true selves?  Are we seeing ourselves through our own eyes ? Or are we seeing ourselves in an untrue way, through the eyes of society? Are we seeing ourselves the way other people say they see us?

Are we perceiving ourselves through the eyes of society and the stigma and misconceptions of society?

Are we still seeing ourselves from the eyes of our abuser? Are we really worthless and stupid?  Are we doomed to never do any better in life than we are doing? Or are we confusing our true potential with the twisted ideas that some abuser fed to us?

The problem with people who have experienced abuse, is that they were manipulated at the deepest levels of their brains.  People who were abused as children were made to feel worthless from a very young age. The natural developmental stages of self conception and identity were damaged.

People that in domestic abuse, were emotionally and mentally damaged. The abuser uses mind manipulation to make the person feel useless and stupid. The narcissists forces a fictitious reality on their victim and this reality changes.

The abuser changes the reality, constantly on order to manipulate the victim. If the victim buys something that the abuser wants at the store, the abuser may hide it. Then they will call the victim stupid for forgetting to buy the item at the store.

This reality manipulation over time, has the effect of confusing the victim about their own sense of reality. After the victim leaves the domestic abuse situation, they still have a feeling of shame and worthlessness. It takes time before the person will be able to see the proper perspective about who they are.

If we have been abused, we do not have the same sense of ease in feeling “normal.” We feel different that other people and often do not feel like we “fit in.” That sense of shame that we experienced during abuse, still looms over us.

Nineteenth century scientist Charles Darwin, in his book The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals, described shame affect as consisting of blushing, confusion of mind, downward cast eyes, slack posture, and lowered head… Wikipedia

This quote by Darwin is interesting to me, in that he describes the physical and mental appearance of shame. He describes the physical manifestation of shame to be “downcast eyes, lowered head”..

When I was living in an abusive relationship, I got comments a few times from people, that I looked down when a man entered the room. I was not aware that I did this at the time.

Actually it was one of my hospice patients that first pointed it out to me. She noticed that when a male aide came into the room to assist me, I lowered my head and looked down. I would not make eye contact with him.

As soon as the man left the room, my female patient said to me “Never! Never, look down when you meet a man! You are just as good as them. You are taking in a submissive posture with men and you should not.”

I was very surprised that I had done this and not even been aware of it. After that incident, I tried to be mindful of my body language with men and women, at least just to be aware of what message I was sending. Also to be aware of how I felt about men.

It is amazing that a woman on her death bed was so mindful and caring about me, that she noticed this and “scolded” me about it. It hurt her to see me be submissive to men like that. She was seeing into the future and how that submissiveness was going to harm me.

This lady knew nothing about the fact that I was living in an abusive relationship. It was purely an outside perspective.

Clearly, at that time, I felt afraid of men and my way of protecting myself was to take on the “submissive” posture. I also had a feeling if needing to protect my face from being hit. The downward position of my head, made me feel safer.

Psychiatrist Judith Lewis Herman had theories about shame as it related to childhood abuse. Her studies were about how a person from childhood abuse sees themselves through the eyes of their abusers.

toxic shame is induced, inside children, by all forms of child abuse. Incest and other forms of child sexual abuse can cause particularly severe toxic shame. Toxic shame often induces what is known as complex trauma in children who cannot cope with toxic shaming as it occurs and who dissociate the shame until it is possible to cope with.[18] Judith Lewis Herman

Abusers tell their victims to feel shame. They shame them by verbally abusing them, mentally torturing them, sexually violating them and / or otherwise physically harming them. There is no physical abuse without mental abuse.

There is no sexual abuse without mental abuse. The damage to a person, goes into their identity, their self esteem and their ability to view themselves in a “normal” way.

What I mean by “normal” is to be able to view yourself on a scale of reality based levels. What you are worth to yourself, and other people should be based on the person that you are. When a victim views themselves through the eyes of the abusers, they will always have a feeling of secret shame.

It is hard to break the brain patterns that were inflicted upon you by your abusers. You are worthy! You are important! You matter! Those are the true things that you need to know and believe!

Your abuser did not want you to know that you were a worthy and special person. They may not even have wanted to know that themselves, because it was easier for them to abuse you if they thought of you as “inhuman” rather than a real person.

You are a real person. you are just as valuable and worthy of love as anyone.

Over time we can heal from these wounds. The PTSD (post traumatic stress) will never go away entirely. The past history of abuse will never go away. It is something we have to live with for the rest of our lives.

Instead of trying to crush it down, push the memories into the deepest recesses of our minds, we need to be ourselves and connect with others who will understand. We need to support and validate each other.

Together we can heal to a point where we can function better. Together we can create a community of support and love, that will uplift each and every one of us. Together we can turn our trauma around and use what we have learned to help others.

 

Going the Wrong Speed

.
Do you ever feel like your speed is off kilter?
Like you’re walking through time and space by yourself
Not keeping in time with everyone else
 
Your step seems just fine but it doesn’t keep time
With the other feet and toes that walk along the street
Your swagger and pace just do not sway so neat
 
The beat of the drum that the other ones walk to
Seems like a distant and far away sound
Your dreams want to pull your two feet off the ground
 
Your rhythm is different than those that conform
But this is all right if your speed is your own
And it picks up and slows as you walk down the road
 
For the misfits and the lovers and the artists keep time
With a different kind of rhythm from their own unique mind
So choose your own colors and paint your own rhyme !

Previous Older Entries

Categories

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,703 other followers